I have to be honest with you. RIGHT before I read this post, I had just taken a selfie of my 32 week pregnant belly(#11), standing with my kid (#7), right after working out (#1).
I have a love/hate relationship with the ‘selfie’. It reminds me of how I used to feel about texting. I thought it was the most annoying thing one could do, and I vowed I NEVER would do it. These days, TRY and get me on the phone. It’s impossible. If you can’t tell me in a text, then you are waiting a LONG time for a response. It’s just the way my life is these days. Too busy and too much going on, so I turn to texting to communicate quickly. Just as the ‘selfie’ allows me to post photos of myself to friends and family who may be remotely interested, and/or following me on my FB page.
As I mentioned, I had just came back working out, and was about to post said ‘selfie’, on my Facebook page, when I came across the article below. Listen, am I going to stop taking selflies? No. Just like when I came across this ‘someecard’ online, I didn’t stop posting about my workouts, but STILL gave me a pretty damn good laugh.
OR, when I saw this video parody, I didn’t stop taking instagram photos
It’s JUST SO FUNNY to bring to light things we do all the time and don’t think for a second, others MAY find it annoying or ridiculous. It’s the age in which we live. With all this technology, we are each given the opportunity to offer others a glimpse into our lives, no matter how boring or exciting they are. We used to be able to just take the photos. But now, with Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Myspace etc. it makes it that much easier to share these photos so instantly, that sometimes it’s just so hard to pass up! It’s harmless. But, when you come across a post like this, it’s a reminder of just how funny and/or stupid some of these so called ‘selfies’ come off.
I present the Top 16 Worst selflies out there….
1. The Gym Selfie (Because the checkin isn’t enough.)
2. The Pet Selfie (If you want to post a picture of your pet, post a picture of your pet.)
Unless this happens, then it’s ok:
3. The Car Selfie AKA The Seatbelt Selfie (You LITERALLY got in the car and thought, “I look so good today, I better let everyone know before I put this thing in drive and head to my shift at the Olive Garden.”)
If you can combine the Seatbelt Selfie with the beloved Shirtless Selfie like this unattractive fella below, you..are…GOLD.
4. The Blurry Selfie (Why?)
5. The Just Woke Up Selfie
6. Or even worse, the Pretending to Be Asleep Selfie. (We know you’re not asleep, asshole. You took the damn picture.)
7. The Add a Kid Selfie (Extra points for a C-section scar.)
8. The Hospital Selfie (A rare gem. The more tubes you have hooked up to you, the better.)
9. The “I’m On Drugs” Selfie (This looker below also qualifies as theLook At My New Haircut Selfie.)
10. The Duck Face Selfie (Hey girls. This doesn’t make you prettier. It makes you look stupid and desperate. If that’s what you’re going for, carry on.)
11. The Pregnant Belly Selfie (Send this to your family and friends, not the entire Internet.)
12. The “I’m a Gigantic Whore” Selfie
Nice phone case, by the way.
13. The “I Have Enough Money to Fly On an Airplane” Selfie (AND I own earbuds.)
14. The 3D Selfie. (It takes talent…along with class.)
15. The Say Something That Has Nothing To Do With Anything Selfie(You had a great night? Oh.)
16. The “I Live In Filth” Selfie (We all make messes, but if you’re going to post your living quarters on the World Wide Web, pick up your damn room.)
There are so many more, but I’m running out of time on my prepaid Wi-Fi at the Internet cafe and I still have to check Youporn and Friendster. In conclusion: If there’s really something on your face or body you HAVE to share (Halloween makeup/costume, fine, whatever), and there is no one around to take a photo, then society will let you slide, but other than that, please try to refrain from letting the world know you think you’re hot in the most douchetastic of ways. And remember, friends don’t let friends selfie.
I miss flip phones,
*Photos 12, 14 & 15 from TheChive.com
Hope you all had a good laugh. I know I did!