I can probably relate to every single one of these points, and although I’m still fairly young I think I’ve done a lot of soul-searching (a.k.a. gone to a crap-load of therapy), so I whole-heartedly agree with these 10 choices that you’ll regret later on in life
- Wearing a mask to impress others: I am an imperfect person, and I think that my imperfections and flaws all roll into what makes me, well, ME. It’s difficult to not care what others think of you, I certainly still worry about it sometimes, but the difference is that I don’t let it control who I choose to be. Be true to yourself before it’s too late and you forget who you are.
2. Letting someone else create your dreams for you: If you haven’t seen the musical Gypsy, then you may not have learned this important lesson. (“I had a dream. A dream about you, baby. It’s gonna come true, baby.”) Now that you’ve decided to stay true to yourself, stay true to what you want to do.
3. Keeping negative company: This one can be tough, because we often feel obligated towards others, especially if they have been in our lives for a long time. There’s this great analogy that I heard at a meditation retreat: if someone gives you a gift that you don’t want, you can simply refuse it. If someone is giving you negativity, it is THEIR negativity to give, you have no obligation to accept it. I was thinking about that for a while and I’ve added my own addendum: when we do accept a gift that we don’t want, we often either hang on to it for far too long, letting it take up space, or we re-gift it. I don’t want to hang on to negativity and anger, nor do I want to give it to someone else.
4. Being selfish and egotistical: The previous points are about doing important things for ourselves, but there is a balance we have to strike. It is human nature to want to live on past our deaths (one argument says this is the main reason we have children), if we only think about ourselves then our deeds die with us. If we give and share with others, we live on.
5.Avoiding change and growth: definitely something I feared for a long time – I am a lady set in her ways. The thing is though that everything is always changing, we’ve got to accept that the old needs to fade away for the new to take its place. If you’re finding it tough, listen to “Still” by Ben Folds, it’s awesome, I promise.
6. Giving up when the going gets tough: I never understood that expression “When the going gets tough, the tough gets going” because it sounds like they just go away instead of dealing with the problem. Anyway, everything is a learning opportunity, and it’s a little ridiculous to expect to succeed 100% of the time. Often, I find I learn far more from mucking up than I do if things go smoothly.
7. Trying to micromanage every little thing: I love the phrase this article uses, “Life should be touched, not strangled”. I love to-do lists and itineraries as much as the next person (alright, way more. I friggin’ love planning), but if yoga has taught me anything, it’s that sometimes you’ve just got to breathe.
8. Settling for less than you deserve: hello last relationship. Oftentimes we accept the love we think we deserve. This phrase is about romantic relationships but it can also apply to friends, family, even jobs. It’s hard to let go, but sometimes it’s necessary to let go of what we have so that we are open to accept what we deserve.
9. Endlessly waiting until tomorrow: don’t put off to tomorrow what you can do today; whether it’s the laundry, an assignment, or following your dreams. Life is short, so live it already.
10. Being lazy and wishy-washy: Another great phrase from this article, “develop a backbone not a wishbone” – although that dog did teach me a lot about literature. Take control of your life, it’s YOUR life, so you should be doing the living, not waiting for things to happen to you or fall into your lap.