Now some of these may strike you as old fashioned or out of date. The term ‘old fashioned’ often brings out feelings of being ‘out dated’ or prudish but these long lost dating habits are anything but.
- Coming to the door to pick up your date: This one was a big one for my dad who would not stand for a guy honking his horn at one of his daughters. In the 30 seconds that it takes to walk to someone’s door you are showing them that they actually are worth your effort instead of sending the “Here” text.
- Dressing Nicely for a Date: Now this can mean a whole host of different things for different people. It’s simply about putting some effort into your appearance and showing that other person that hey, you’re worth my time and my time with you is special.
- Bringing Flowers: This one is mostly for the guys, but the gesture signals interest and time and effort. It’s hard to put yourself out there so much
- Changing it Up: Don’t get me wrong, a dinner and a movie is a great date but it’s often an expensive one. It’s also a safety net for a lot of people. Go for walks, picnics, ice skating, hikes, biking, treasure hunt, golfing, coffee, the bookstore. Getting into a rut is an incredibly easy trap to get into but it’s well worth the time and effort to switch it up.
- Dancing: I’m not talking grinding it out in some dive bar which has it’s own place...but certainly isn’t romantic. Finding a nice place to actually slow dance is well worth the effort. Consider taking ballroom lessons; samba, salsa, waltz...the list is endless. My husband has even conceded that dance lessons were some of his favorite dates.
- “Going Steady”: Nothing is more awkward than the “are we or aren’t we” dating talk. It’s basically torture. Be clear about your intentions and what you want out of the relationship. It’s better to find out early if someone isn’t on the same track that you are.
- Turning Phones Off: Nothing is more infuriating than when, halfway through a date, someone picks up their phone to check facebook, text their friend back, or browse the internet. Although phones have their time and place, it isn’t respectful at all. People and relationships are what matter and they take work.
- Not Assuming Sex is a Given: I am not advocating that we should revert back to a time when sex was taboo to even bring up but instead I am advocating not having expectations that a date whether that be 1st, 3rd, or 10th is going to lead to sex. Everyone is at a different point in their lives and being respectful of boundaries can create an incredibly strong bond. A date doesn’t have to be a precursor to sex and you shouldn’t be disappointed if it isn’t because you don’t have the right to expect it.