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Cheating Can Save Your Heart

June 29, 2015 2 min read

In the ideal relationship it's all very clear. You may see other people and find them attractive (you aren't dead, after all), but you don't cultivate relationships with them. You don't kiss and confide in them. You don't make love to them. Every couple defines their terms of fidelity, but it is expected in virtually all of them unless both parties are aware of where the fences are to be left open. When you are secure in yourself and your relationship and then your partner cheats anyway, thank him or her as you move on. You've been handed a painful but precious gift. Even when life is long it's short. I heard that from my mother over the years, after she'd endured my father's departure for another woman. "And when you live life afraid, you live a small life". When your partner desires someone else enough to seek out intimacy, maybe that partner will realize the mistake and return with renewed commitment and never do it again. But please remember that at this point YOU are driving the relationship. You are deserving of the commitment that makes you feel whole, appreciated, and fulfilled. A cheating partner is not always a horrible person, but is always an uncertain one, lacking conviction in the relationship and/or the courage to end one that has lost its emotional resonance. If you didn't know this until the infidelity, well, you know now. And this just saved your heart. Like life-saving open heart surgery that cracks you open right down the middle, for a time in there your blood is circulating outside of you and your heart stops beating altogether. When you learn you've been cheated on, those first minutes feel like that. But perhaps it is your healing to find the grace to say to your cheating partner, "Thank you. By your example, you have just given me the chance to open myself again to Life and the one who will choose me over others every time. " Can a relationship survive infidelity? Is it the ultimate deal breaker? What constitutes cheating?   h/t: Elite Daily    

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