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Would You Consider An Open Relationship?

June 09, 2015 3 min read

I'm going to ask you right away and I want you to answer yourself honestly before reading on: Would you ever consider an open relationship? Jada Smith appeared on Howard Stern's Sirius XM radio show. She answered Stern's questions about her open marriage with husband of 20 years, Will Smith. She said:

You gotta trust who you’re with, and at the end of the day, I’m not here to be anybody’s watcher. I’m not his watcher. He’s a grown man. I trust that the man that Will is a man of integrity.

“He’s got all the freedom in the world, and as long as Will can look at himself in the mirror and be okay, I’m good.
jada Well said. All of this got me thinking. It isn't like entering a committed relationship means the death of our most basic natures. We are still going to look. We are still going to be attracted to other people. I'm not suggesting we are unable to control those urges but I'm also not necessarily sure we need to. When I look back at my past relationships, I can feel the insecurity. I was with someone for several years, I was exclusive, he wasn't. And I knew he wasn't. I asked him, he lied. We went around in that circle for some time. I was crushed at first. What did she have that I didn't? It ate me up for some time. But the longer this went on, the more I came to realize it wasn't about that. When he was with me, he was with me. He was engaged with me. He was into me. My problem wasn't that he was with another woman, it was that he lied to me about it. The lying was one of the things that ended us. How could I trust anything he had to say? If we take the expectation of exclusivity out of our relationships, we remove that trust barrier. If we let our partners know that we trust them to do whatever feels right to them, and really trust that -- no matter what it looks like, we open the relationship to a depth and understanding it cannot attain when insecurity abounds. Taking this approach celebrates the integrity of your partner. Being honest is such an important tool in all of our relationships. We need to be honest with ourselves and each other. If your partner is honest with you, you can then make decisions going forward. It may be that another woman is too much for you to handle but if your partner is up front (and you are too) than you can make an informed choice to stay or go. Your partner is honouring you by giving you the knowledge. Secrets breed terrible things in relationships. One thing is clear, Jada and Will sure look happy. willjada2 When you remove rules and limitations from relationships, you really celebrate one another as beautiful, individual creatures. You cannot hold on to your partner with a white knuckle grip and expect the relationship to survive. Perhaps true openness should be the new relationship standard. With all of this in mind, I ask you again: Would you ever consider an open relationship? h/t: Elite Daily Do you follow us on Instagram? [caption id="attachment_100032" align="alignnone" width="100"]snapchat code @BodyRockTV[/caption]

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