Love can have us swept off our feet and sometimes all logistics seem to fall away. Before you get super serious, you have to get to know some important things about your partner. No matter how head over heels you may be, asking these questions can determine whether you're really compatible: #1 "Where do you want to live?" If you have visions of a big, country house while your partner dreams of a downtown condo, you may want to get things cleared up sooner than later. Avoiding this conversation can lead to fighting later down the road, so figure out what kind of middle ground you and your partner can agree upon. #2 "Do you want children?" “You don’t want one person expecting to start a family while the other actually has no interest in having children." says relationship expert Jane Greer, Ph.D. Even if your partner and you agree that starting a family will be in your future, how you will raise your children should also be a dialogue to engage in. What are your stances on discipline? Family values? Would you put them public school, private school or homeschool them? #3 "Are your religious?" A follow-up to the conversation on children, knowing if your partner is religious is a good way to map up how you will raise your family. It also plays a role in how your wedding will be conducted, and what beliefs your partner will uphold when it comes to your marriage. Knowing more about each other's backgrounds and views will help you better understand one another as well. #4 "Is handling finances a strength or weakness of yours?" If your partner is bad with money, it's best to know sooner rather than later. Couples fight over finances more than any other issue. “It’s important to know you have similar values about money and finances," says Greer. "Otherwise, it will be difficult to have shared financial goals you can both work toward." #5 "What is your relationship like with your parents?" Particularly the relationship between your partner and their opposite-sex parent. If a man's connection with his mother is strong and respectful, that is good sign. If it is a rocky relationship, that throws up a red flag. “Some men have mothers who were self-involved, neglectful, or even abusive while they were growing up. Under those circumstances, healthy distance from her would be understandable." explains Megan Fleming, Ph.D., sex and relationship expert. The fact that your partner has made a smart choice to distance themselves from their neglectful parent without harbouring extreme resentment or anger towards them is positive character trait. #6 "How do you handle pressure?" If a bad day spurs on anger issues or delayed flight causes an outburst at the flight attendant, these are things you need to know. Your partner becoming frustrated or having anxiety attacks are things you need to be aware of and know how to handle appropriately. #7 "How much sex do you want?" “As a sex therapist for 15-plus years in New York City, I’ve seen it all," says Fleming. "It’s important that you find out how important sex is to both of you because the reality is there’s a huge range." There is no magic number for a healthy sex-life. But knowing what each other's desires are is the first step to building a relationship that works for both of you. What are your thoughts? How did you know your partner was perfect for you? Source: Your Tango Do you follow us on Instagram?
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