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What It Feels Like To Always Be An Option And Never A Priority

June 09, 2015 3 min read 5 Comments

When everything in your life is going well, you feel on top of the world. It is like you can conquer anything that comes your way. But what happens when you feel unrequited love? All of those wonderful feelings disappear and you begin living in your own personal hell. You hold this person in your life as a priority. You'd drop everything for them in an instant. But to them, you are little more than an option.

It hurts worse than anything.

Love can be best friend or worst enemy to your ego. When you love, you open yourself up and make yourself vulnerable to the other person. You are offering yourself as a sacrifice. Your hope is that this person sees you, loves you. You hand that person the knife with which to cut you but hope like hell they don't. But when you find out that this is your desire, and not really one of theirs, it feels like that person drove that blade through your heart.

It's the most embarrassing feeling in the world.

You may feel heartbroken, but you are also likely to feel embarrassed. When you tell someone you love them (or even pine for them secretly), you've exposed a part of yourself that few people get to see. When your love gets tossed back at you, it can make you feel silly for even believing something was possible. You may not be getting laughed at but it sure feels like it.

It makes you question your self worth.

You are awesome. You know you are awesome but when love gets rejected, it can make you rethink all of it. If you were so great, s/he would choice you, right? If you sit with this long enough, you will come to see it isn't you. You're fine. That person either couldn't see you for you or was looking for something else in a partner and you know what, that's okay too. But in the meantime, this will sting.

 Your life and your future have been altered and it is scary.

When your love is unrequited, you spend your days trying to become the perfect person for someone who is entirely the wrong person. It ends up being a waste of time but it also ends up leaving you in a position where you will have to dramatically change direction. So much uncertainty.

It makes you question your perceptions.

Love tints everything a much nicer colour. We do everything with a sense of purpose. When love is not returned, we lose that sense of purpose. Most people get completely blindsided and wiped out by this type of heartbreak. You can't lose yourself in your love, as easy as it may seem. Your life still has to exist for you. If you take a close look around, you will see that nothing really has changed...

It ticks you off and motivates you.

You're allowed to be upset. Anger can be a great motivator. Do not direct this anger at yourself. Do not direct this anger at the person who hurt you. You don't deserve it and neither do they. If you really want to get back at them, build a life for yourself that is truly grand. The best revenge is living well, don't you know.

It makes you realize you need to slow down and redirect.

Take a deep breath. Do not avoid dealing with this, face it head on. Locate your lessons in all of this. Get to know your world once again. The one that exists outside of your head. It isn't easy. Very little in life is. All you can do is keep moving yourself forward. Enjoy it! Don't be an option or a second choice. You deserve top billing in someone's heart. If you respect yourself, you will find someone who sees your worth and your value. And when you do, this will all make more sense. h/t: Elite Daily    

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