Now I love instagram as much as the next girl....welllll if I am really honest I LOVE LOVE instagram probably more than most people. I try to avoid posting too many "selfie" style pics, but sometimes a girl just can't resist. So when I saw this HILARIOUS blog post on http://wittyandpretty.com/ about what it would look like if guys posted like girls do I nearly peed myself laughing - sure puts some things in perspective!
Not enough perspective to stop instragraming though of course - are you crazy!?
1. The cozy coffee shot.
Do you follow us on Instagram?
It only took 4937492874 attempts to get the perfect candid photo, and if you don’t have a Starbucks holiday cup, you’re doing it wrong. That #BlanketScarf
2. The unrelated sexy selfie.
“Super sale at Kohl’s!” “Get out there and vote!” “I’m on an airplane!” What does any of that have to do with a close-up of your come-hither face? It doesn’t. You’re a narcissist. @aaronchewning
3. The aerial coffee in bed shot.
A chick blogger staple. But like, WHOSE ASS IS IN YOUR FACE TAKING THIS?
4. #Blessed hot dog legs.
Because nothing says “relaxation” like your upper thigh meat.
5. The Marilyn Monroe.
Enough said. (Even better when you botch the quote.)
6. The fashion blogger PicStitch.
Because one pose and one photo of your outfit is NEVER ENOUGH. Extra points for an introspective quote.
Also, doing physical activities in unpractical ensembles (plus coffee always).
7. THE CUPCAKE.
Extra points if it’s Sprinkles (OMGGGG), a seasonal flavor, and you’re on a park bench. Also known as the @YouDidNotEatThat.
8. Sneaky dog selfie.
Yes you may
be taking a photo of your “fur baby” (gag) but it’s still a selfie, SORRY. Even worse if you’re pretending to be asleep yet still taking a photo of yourself (why?).
9. Outfit of the day (#OOTD) mirror selfie.
The more descriptive the better because we really care.
10. Gym selfie reflection.
Again, one photo of you sticking out your ass and sucking in your stomach until you nearly pass out is never enough. Plus, you’re artsy.
11. The eat clean/green smoothie selfie.
You have to show the world you’re doing a body good whilst also showing us how attractive you are. Extra points for Lululemon (thumb holes OMG), tree Emoji, and 8,000 hashtags.
12. The BFF birthday PicStitch.
If you don’t do a collage of flattering photos for your bestie’s birthday, you’re a terrible friend.
13. The “Look at my ass while I pretend to refer to something else” sneak.
You’re not fooling anyone, skanks.
14. The beach “office” humblebrag.
You’re the worst.
15. The skinny arm pose and/or sorority squat.
If you combine the two with duck face and IDGAF expressions, you win Instagram.
16. Baby belly mirror selfie.
If you don’t do this in the third trimester, you’re an unfit mother.
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