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The Real Reasons Women Pick Fights With The Men They Love

May 15, 2015 3 min read

Fighting isn't always about fighting for something. Sometimes we fight and in the middle of it, we know we are being ridiculous but it is too late to turn back. Like that fight about how if he really loved you, he would have known what you were thinking. Yes, we do know it is irrational. Sometimes we pick fights because we feel something is off. We pick fights because we can't figure out what we are really upset about. Or sometimes, we are trying to ignore what we are really upset about. We are completely ashamed of these moments. And you forgive us and love us anyway but the guilt still hurts. It is something we try to control but some of us are frighteningly unable. It is like we know we are losing our minds but can't stop. We can only really make guesses at why we do these things.

Because we're bored.

Sometimes we're just stirring the pot. Some of us like drama and excitement and if it weren't for us, the relationship would be bland.

Because make-up sex is the best.

If the fight is over nothing, patching it up should be easy which leaves nothing to do but have make-up sex. If we can get over the fight, we might as well get under the sheets.

Because things are going too well.

Some of us have the habit of self sabotage. In that instance, we aren't trying to hurt him, we are only out to get ourselves. We look past all the good to the one bad thing (which may not even actually exist). We are looking for reasons to be unhappy.

Because we like to see how far we can push him.

Just testing the waters. Seeing how far things will go before stopping. Some women set up these tests. They push a man to see how far things will go before he tells us off. It is a test of his self respect.

Because he's refusing to address anything.

Some women are prone to picking at little things when he won't address a bigger thing. It is a way of ripping everything apart in the relationship until there is nothing left but the cold, hard truth of the unresolved issue.

Because we care.

Sometimes, caring is picking. Think of your mother or your grandmother. Some women pick at things because he won't. Love means noticing little things. Sometimes it means trying to 'correct' little things so his life will run more smoothly without our help. It isn't really helpful but we think it is.

Because we've played the chill girl for so long that we just explode.

Sometimes it isn't easy to be the 'cool girl.' Some women get stuck in this trap in an attempt to be the perfect girlfriend but being chill can lead to a boil over. You can only do it for so long before the pressure leads to an explosion.

Because we know he'll forgive us.

He is the only person we can unload on. He can take our crap and move forward like nothing happened. He is our therapist, our sounding board and sometimes, our garbage dump. But he is always our best friend. We know that even when we are irrational, neurotic and completely out of line, he's not going to leave. h/t: Elite Daily

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