Your Cart is Empty

Stop Being A People Pleaser And Learn How To Say "No!"

June 16, 2015 3 min read

If you are anything like me, saying 'no' is incredibly difficult. It is such a tiny little word and yet, so difficult. Saying 'no,' is something central to your health and well being. If you are constantly taking things on, or doing things for the benefit of others, things in your own life could start to slip away. You could become overwhelmed and stressed out. The good news is, you can learn how to say 'no.' "Ultimately after saying no to a few things, you learn that other people will step up to take care of them, and that you do not always have to be the one to handle issues that come up," says Art Markman, Ph.D., a professor in the Department of Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin.

Why is it so hard to say no?

You can't start saying 'no' until you start to unpack why you keep saying 'yes.' Kristen Carpenter, PhD, Director of Women's Behavioral Health at Ohio State's Wexner Medical Center, says it may be because you were conditioned from childhood to do what is asked of you. She says, "We're not socialized to say no... We're raised to be nurturing, cooperative, and sharing in ways little boys are not. This sets us up for life, and it's difficult for some women to be assertive." Women are often more agreeable than men. Markman says, "That refers to how much we want to be liked by other people. Agreeable people tend to say yes to requests, because that makes the person who asked like them in the moment. On average, women rank much higher in agreeableness than men." Men are pressured to be assertive because to be too agreeable, presents as weakness. One the flip side, assertive women are seen as 'bitchy' and 'difficult.' Who wants to be considered weak or a bitch? The desire to avoid such a label may make you say yes far more often than you should. "To assert oneself feels like the wrong thing to do," Carpenter says. "But you should be able to express your thoughts, feelings and rights, and do so in a direct, open and honest manner."

How to effectively say, 'no.'

If a woman says no, she is more likely to be asked why than a man. And women often feel guilty for saying no, especially at work where the fight for promotion can be much more difficult. Be strong and firm and know your value. Here is exactly what you need to do: Consider a request first. Don't respond immediately. "For women who are highly agreeable, it is important to thank people for asking for their help and to say that they will check their calendar and get back to them soon," says Markman. "Taking the time to think over a request gives the person control over when she responds rather than having to do it under pressure." Go straight to the source. Don't be afraid to tell the person 'no' to his/her face. Don't use a go between. "Take the message right to the source," says Carpenter. "The purpose of this is owning it. You have to own your response." Be very clear. Do not waffle. Do not muddy your words. Many women say things like "I don't think I can take that on right now" which leaves room for the other person to muscle you into it. "Women are more inclined to leave the door open, or end a sentence with a question instead of a declarative," she says. "Be specific, clear and direct." Do not feel the need to explain yourself. You don't have to explain yourself to anyone. Ever. Do not back down. If you start out saying no but give in later, you are establishing your no's as meaningless. You will be pestered after you've already given a response. "You have to stick with it," Carpenter explains. "When you say no, mean it." That doesn't sound so difficult. I think I will start today! How about you?

Leave a comment

Also in BodyRock Store Blog

Image of Bodyrock blog article - What Happens To Your Butt When You Sit All Day?
What Happens To Your Butt When You Sit All Day?

July 14, 2019 3 min read 471 Comments

Do you think your booty looks a little flat? This might be why!
Read More
Image of Bodyrock blog article - 12 Ways To Make Your Belly Flatter By The End Of The Day
12 Ways To Make Your Belly Flatter By The End Of The Day

July 08, 2017 4 min read 37 Comments

Read More
Image of Bodyrock blog article - 7 Ways To Stop Binge Eating In It's Tracks
7 Ways To Stop Binge Eating In It's Tracks

June 22, 2017 2 min read 1 Comment

Do you ever find yourself knuckle-deep in a bag of Cheetos?
Read More
Shipping & Delivery

Due to COVID-19, shipping systems the world over are experiencing abnormal delays. There is an enormous demand on postal and delivery services as online shopping has skyrocketed, due to store closures and stay-at-home mandates. This is an unprecedented situation, and we are working around the clock to fulfill your orders as quickly as possible. To be clear, we are filling orders in 4-6 days, and we are shipping immediately after that. Once shipped, our shipping partner, UPS, will get your order out to you as quickly as possible. Thanks for your support and understanding.

Are you in Canada? Specifically, are you outside of a metropolitan centre? We need to alert you to a disruption in shipping due to COVID-19. Our preferred shipping provider, UPS, has informed us that they cannot guarantee express shipping for many locations. We have also seen that packages delivered to Toronto, Ottawa, Vancouver, etc, are not waylaid, but packages delivered to areas just outside of these cities are being held in transit for days or even weeks. UPS has discontinued their guarantee of 1-4 day delivery, which you can read more about here. Therefore, we can guarantee early fulfillment but not early delivery of our goods from our warehouse to your door at this time.

We want you to start your fitness journey with us as quickly as possible, that’s why we send every package to the USA & Canada via expedited or standard shipping (whichever is faster) with our partners at UPS. Once your order has been processed successfully we try to have your shipment prepared within 4-6 business days, and it typically takes 2-4 days to get to you once it leaves our warehouse.

We currently DO NOT SHIP to locations outside of the US and Canada. We DO NOT ship to a P.O. Box number.

We ship all of our physical products with UPS, from our warehouse location in Kingston, Ontario, Canada. Sometimes delivery can be delayed by circumstances out of our control, like postal & custom delays, back-ordered products or incorrectly entered shipping addresses. If there is a delay at Customs, a representative of UPS may contact you to provide your identification in order to receive your package. Please do this ASAP: Customers will be responsible for any additional shipping fees for failure to provide the required information to release a shipment.

Make sure when checking out and paying for your order that all of your information entered is correct! If you notice a mistake in your address, please try to contact us before your order is processed for shipping to avoid any missed shipments or delays. As soon as we process your order for shipping, you will receive a shipping confirmation email that contains your UPS tracking number. You can head on over to the UPS Website to see where your products are. Note: tracking information may take 1-2 business days to be updated in the UPS system

If you are not home when your package is delivered, BodyRock is NOT responsible if it is stolen. Please contact us if this happens to you and we will provide you with all the information needed to take the next steps.
Returns & Exchanges

BodyRock Equipment

We offer a 30-day return policy, as long as: it is not more than 30 days past the date of delivery; and your item is in its original condition and packaging with the original order number. Refunds will be issued when the equipment is received back to the BodyRock warehouse, minus the original cost of shipping, and the customer is responsible for the costs of return shipping. To request a refund on physical product purchases, please contact us.

Digital Products

We cannot issue refunds on digital goods such as e-books or videos, as these are non-tangible goods that are irrevocable once the order is placed.


All of the BodyRock clothing is made to order and so is final sale. If you have any questions about sizing prior to placing your order, please contact us.