October 16, 2015
This Is How Women Lose Their Identity in Relationships
Recently, Chrissy Teigen shut down a street vendor for talking about her like she wasn't a real person, calling her “John Legend’s wife.” It's not a matter of not wanting to be associated with her famous husband, it's the fact that these types of comments make women not only feel inferior to their partners, but strip them of their independence. Although people in high profile relationships often face this with little control, non-celebrities have the same issue as well, except sometimes it's their own doing. From the words we say to the things we do, it's extremely easy to pick up this co-dependent type of behavior subconsciously; that slowly but surely removes us from being an independent person, but merely one half of a relationship. Here are some instances to consider: Having your partner accompany you for every single outing. Do you always find yourself trying to make sure the invitation is for both you and your significant other? Your friends may have wanted it to be a girls' night, but they figure out quickly that you and your man are one entity, and there's no you without him. And if you do fly solo one night, you find yourself being asked if everything is OK between you guys. Adopting your partner’s habits and preferences. Does your partner hate Coldplay? Do they despise yoga? So do you. And when someone finally speaks up and asks you why, you suddenly find yourself wondering for the first time the same thing yourself. Bragging about his successes as if they’re your own. Being proud of your man is a wonderful thing, but it's his thing, not yours. Don't overshadow his successes by giving people the feeling that you are the reason for such things like his career progression. Watch your language. Calling someone your "other half" or your "better half" is most definitely taking away your independence. Though it can seem kind of cutesy, the reality of it is that phrases like this make others assume you don't see the value in yourself outside of your relationship. Are you guilty of any of these?