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This shit will kill you - but it will make you fat first.

July 11, 2013 2 min read

In news that is sure to astound anyone not living under a rock, yet another study has revealed that Diet Drinks containing the seed of Satan - sold under the brand name "Aspartame" will make you just as fat as regular full sugar soft-drinks. Studies indicate that drinks sweetened with Aspartame are linked to weight-gain, diabetes and heart disease. Just one can of this chemical nectar a day can dramatically increase the risk of high blood pressure. More interestingly however are the claims that Aspartame is addictive and habit forming. I've been battling an ongoing addiction to Diet Coke or "DC" as its known on the street for most of my adult life. If you have a DC addiction it's no joke - just ask anyone with a 6 can a day habit. When I confided my addiction to my doctor he quipped "there are worse things to be addicted to". Strictly speaking that may be true, but it wasn't particularly helpful. In the grand scheme of things my pop addiction simply didn't register with my doctor - next patient please! Marketing DC as a "low-calorie" option implies a health benefit, and this is prevalent in Coke's new community focused anti-obesity PR campaigns. Maybe I've been watching too many episodes of Mad Men, but soft drink manufacturers remind me a lot of big tabacco in the 1950's - they know that they are selling a harmful product to the public, yet they remained fixated on the bottom line. Cut out a few checks to the boys and girls club, shoot a few commercials and roll with the punches. Sign up a mega celebrity like Beyonce and leave the rest to Don Draper and the boys. At the end of the day it's all a god-damn filthy pack of lies, but it looks good (shake your money maker Beyonce) sounds great and tastes as sweet as ever. I have a few questions for you guys fizzing around in my DC addled brain. Explain to me why Aspartame is not a banned substance? Should cans of pop carry warning labels like cigarettes? Do we really need the hand of big government to shield us or should it be an individual choice? Lastly if its left to the individual who picks up the ballooning health care costs associated with obesity? I'm looking forward to reading what you have to say. Best, Freddy


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