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Why You Will Always Love The People You've Loved Before

June 30, 2015 3 min read

Our interactions with people shape us and we don't always know it. Was the course of my life altered by the sweet lady working the check out at the grocery store? No. But I did leave the building wearing a smile that I didn't have when I walked in. Think about it. People change and impact other people. When you love someone, that impact is magnified. love Loving requires a vulnerability. An openness. Being in a loving relationship plays to our most basic needs. They (should) provide safety and comfort. Your love should be your safe place to land in this world. But sometimes the worst thing happens. You are utterly betrayed and hurt by this person you loved. It has shaken your very foundation and set you off on a different path. It is impossible to tell if this new path is for better or worse. Maybe you've now closed yourself off to love or find you are less trusting. Maybe you've gone on a bitter, self destructive tear just so you don't have to feel. Would life have been better if you could skip this part and live happily in your relationship? Maybe. It surely would have been less painful. But the thing is, as humans, we are wired for survival. We pull ourselves up. We change, we adapt. We move forward. We might make lateral moves first, but we do move forward. We are constantly adding new experiences, knowledge and memories. When we come out the other side, we are so much stronger. And this why you will always love that person who hurt you. You may really dislike this person. I ran into an ex last week and the very sight of him made me feel sick to my stomach. Not because I'm hurt but because I realized that I really, really, really don't like him. I went through hell in that relationship but here I am, still standing. Because of him, I know what I won't stand for in relationships. I've grown and matured on my journey away from him. I am a better person than I was before. I am richer for the experience, painful though it was. And that is why I will always, no matter how deeply it is buried under more important things, love that man. I can't be certain, but it is likely that I would not be who I am today without having had that experience. If you have been hurt and betrayed, if you have been disappointed and let down, know that you will journey through. I know this wasn't the path you thought you'd take through life but sometimes it needs to go dark before the light reappears. You will heal. And you will heal to be even stronger than you were before. And when you come out that other side, say a little thank you to the universe. You may never want to see or hear from your ex again but they've made you better. I'm not saying everything happens for a reason, but you can choose to use your experience of pain in a positive way. Hate that person for what they did to you but love them for allowing you to see your true value. Love them, even in a small way, because you've become an even more incredible person for what they did. Embrace it and a rock on without them. h/t: Elite Daily Do you follow us on Instagram?
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